The Google Misconception

Ok. So this really should be 'the Search Engine misconception' but I thought the former sounded better

A recent project I worked on, the client was quite set on getting good search engine results. In the initial email, they said

So after some (exhaustive) explaining, I went through (as clear as I could) that there are no 'magic keywords' that you can simply specify to an SE, that it's a mix of on and off-site management, analysis and research. I also stressed there is no guarantee for results, and that these things will take time. Three weeks later I get a call, a few days after launch, and the client is asking why they're not getting results on Google!

Ok, I accept they're not to know how these things work, nor should they have to (that's why they hire us in the first place!), but it seems like all my explanations are falling on deaf ears!